t-r-u-t-h's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Bitter Sweet. Once upon a time there was a young girl, desperate for love and the need to be needed. This young girl believed herself to be unlovable. She dreamed of romance and the stars. She could feel herself deeply and was in tune with senses she'd not known she had. One day, when the young girl barely expected it, a young man fell in love with her. The young girl was also smitten with this young man. He said all the right things, exactly what she needed to hear and slowly the young girl began to trust this young man. After sometime this girl forgot about the stars and romance and fell under the spell of the young man. He was what she needed. He was real, not just a distant dream and she dove in head first. She recognized there were problems in the relationship from the very start but nothing would stop her. She wanted this to be her everything, she needed this sample of the feeling that the whole world claimed to be their saving grace. As time went on they had battles and love scene's. There was happiness and some stability in her life suddenly and it was exactly what she'd always needed, but always in the back of her mind was that doubt.. The doubt she would shake off. Eventually the bad times got worse and worse for this young girl and young man. He never noticed there was anything wrong, he was happy to have her with him even when he wasn't there with her. They were long and hard times and after many passionate pleas and arguements he would give and things were good again. It was the summer before this girl became a woman in college when she began to cling to him desperately. She didn't want to go, she didn't want things to change. She wanted to be that weak little girl again, clinging to something familiar and she loved him passionately in this time and he loved her. He was there and what she wanted... But things change with time and the young girl grew into a young woman. On her third day of college she and her love entered another time in their relationships and since have been fighting and struggling to get back out. Every day is another up or down, the consistancy that was once there is there no longer. This young woman misses what she once had, and finally, one day while sitting in her dorm room, listening to music and thinking about resent events she realizes it's time to move on. This young man is no longer what she needs and is very rarely what she wants. Constant arguments plague her days and when the time comes for them to be together it's only after hours of debating and tears on her part that he will come and be with her. Outside of their relationship this young woman is changing her life for the better. She can feel herself growing and developing into the woman she's always wanted to be. It feels good for her. She doesn't need that young man anymore. She's stronger than that and she needs someone who will be as stable as she is and just as caring and giving. Looking back on those years the young woman realizes that he was exactly what she needed then, but he's not forever. She's sacrificed stars and romance and she can't do that anymore. Life can be sweet. But mostly it's bitter sweet. 4:28 p.m. - 2006-02-17 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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